Childhood Treasures

Published by cmadams

I am now a Mother that no one wants to be. I love my children more than life itself and my world got turned upside down when my 1st born son Billy, also known as Liam, was murdered by a stranger in a random act of violence. I have 3 remaining living, breathing, amazing children, 2 sons and 1 daughter, 3 living,breathing,amazing step-sons and each and every one is special,creative,and unique! I also have 3 beautiful grandchildren! 2 Grandsons ages 7and 8 and a precious 3 year old Granddaughter! My Grandson Logan, is Billy’s only child, he is now 8 years old. As my daughter says, he is the warm piece of Billy that we get to touch. I enjoy cherishing and taking care of my husband and my family, leading a healthy lifestyle in spirit, soul and body, clean eating, CrossFit, sunshine,rest, listening to music and singing along! I will never be who I was before this happened. I am dedicated to learn what I can, embrace the pain, and share my raw, wounded, healing heart that is daily changing due to this great tragedy. My hope is touch lives in many ways,no matter how big or small, in honor and in memory of my son, Billy.He will live on through my words, the words of his Mother and the hearts of his family💗 View all posts by cmadams

Better Days, Birthday Cards, Christmas, Christmas Cards, Crime, Death, Family, Grief, Heartache, Homicide, Iguana, Life, Loss, Loss of a child, Loss of a Son to Homicide, Love, Mourning, Murder, Sadness, Third Grade, Valentine Day Cards

I was getting my Christmas decorations out last month and I found a box filled with childhood memories.

I took an hour just sitting and reading each special card that people had lovingly taken the time to buy and sign and mail to me over the years.

They were very special treasures.

Among the old Birthday-Cards, Christmas Cards and Easter Cards from my Parents, Grandparents, and their friends, I came across a Valentine’s Day Card from my 3rd Grade teacher.

When I was 8 years old, I remember feeling anxious in her class. It wasn’t my favorite grade.

Back then, in the early 1980’s, paddling was an acceptable form of punishment.

If you misbehaved or didn’t turn your homework in, you might get a paddling!

I certainly did not want to get paddled!

The boys thought it was funny, but just knowing it was a possibility was enough to bring some of the girls to tears.

Especially me.

I had a very anxious 3rd grade year! I behaved and did my homework but there was one time I wasn’t on task one Friday. I was a basket of nerves that weekend waiting for Monday!

I never did get paddled,but I was glad when 3rd grade was over!

In my box of memories, I found a very sweet homemade valentine from my 3rd grade teacher.

When I was 8 years old, those words went in one ear and out the other. However, 37 years later, they are very special.

Especially the scripture on the back.

What kind words from my 3rd grade teacher.

“We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.“ 1st John 4:16

I really appreciated reading this verse. God’s Word is eternal. 37 years later it is life giving.

“A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it!“

Proverbs 15:23

We all can use words spoken in due season. This little valentine came back to me at just the right time.

I appreciate everyone’s kind words as I find my way through this tangled mess of grief.

Right now I cannot see the big picture, but I trust that someday, what I go through today and how I go through it for the rest of my tomorrow’s,will somehow be a blessing to others and bring honor to my Son’s memory.

My boy and his iguana 🦎

It was a good Christmas, it was a hard Christmas.

These last few days have felt more like surviving and not so much thriving.

I have to believe that there are better days ahead.

Published by cmadams

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