Saturday Nights…

My son was murdered on a Saturday night while walking down a Philadelphia Street with his younger brother and 3 of their friends.

I posted most of the details on my site page as well as one of my blog entries.

Saturday nights were spent relaxing and unwinding. Maybe getting together with friends, watching a movie and grabbing a bite to eat or going to the Saturday evening church service so Sunday we could sleep in.

My husband and I don’t drink alcohol, so Saturday nights are not about getting tipsy or chugging a few beers to relax.

It’s about letting go of last week, catching up with each other and recharging for the next week.

There was a time in each of our younger years where we got more than a little tipsy and chugged cases of beer.

We both came to the realization at separate times in our lives, before we married each other, that alcohol caused more poor choices and consequences that cost us more than we wanted to pay, and kept us in bad situations longer than we wanted to stay.

My husband has been sober for over 22 years and it’s been 17 years for me.

We don’t miss it.We’re not the same people we once were and we’re very okay with that!

If you’re of legal age to drink, that’s your choice!

Have a drink! Raise your glass, it’s all good!

Don’t feel embarrassed because we don’t. You’re not in any way making us uncomfortable!

That Saturday night when I got the phone call that forever changed my life,it changed my Saturday nights too.

No I didn’t start drinking again or fall of the wagon, but I became more of a “helicopter parent”

When our kids aren’t at home on Saturday night,I am constantly checking in with them to make sure that they are safe. I text and call my now 19-year-old son who still lives in Philadelphia, a lot more on Saturdays then I do any other day of the week.

Every Saturday night I think about what happened to Billy on that fateful Saturday night, one week before the super bowl.

The ” if only’s”start going through my head and I can’t change a single thing that happened.

I have to stop that thought process and choose life giving thoughts and just breathe.

We have Logan, he’s happy and healthy and so very much loved. I’m doing my best to tell Billy’s story. I hope my journey through will encourage others that no matter life throws your way, you have a choice. Choose to thrive not just survive.