Published by cmadams
I am now a Mother that no one wants to be. I love my children more than life itself and my world got turned upside down when my 1st born son Billy, also known as Liam, was murdered by a stranger in a random act of violence. I have 3 remaining living, breathing, amazing children, 2 sons and 1 daughter, 3 living,breathing,amazing step-sons and each and every one is special,creative,and unique! I also have 3 beautiful grandchildren! 2 Grandsons ages 7and 8 and a precious 3 year old Granddaughter! My Grandson Logan, is Billy’s only child, he is now 8 years old. As my daughter says, he is the warm piece of Billy that we get to touch. I enjoy cherishing and taking care of my husband and my family, leading a healthy lifestyle in spirit, soul and body, clean eating, CrossFit, sunshine,rest, listening to music and singing along! I will never be who I was before this happened. I am dedicated to learn what I can, embrace the pain, and share my raw, wounded, healing heart that is daily changing due to this great tragedy. My hope is touch lives in many ways,no matter how big or small, in honor and in memory of my son, Billy.He will live on through my words, the words of his Mother and the hearts of his family💗
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2. I’ve learned that even when you receive the most horrific news, it is possible to have and experience the peace that passes all understanding.It’s not a cliche, it’s a choice.
A choice to focus on circumstances or a choice to believe with every breath that this chaos is taking place in the palm of God’s hands.
#doigivetoyouletnotyourheartsbetroubledneitherletthembeafraid

After re-reading this post from Instagram on July 2nd I would not change much.
Only reiterate that even though this chaos is taking place in the palm of God’s hand, He did not allow it or cause it to happen.
I have written before what I believe God tried to do to stop what happened that tragic night.
The blog post is titled “Forgiveness.”
I did enjoy my time spent today with my family.
It was my 1st Thanksgiving knowing that I would not be seeing my son Billy.
I was reminded that someday, during the marriage supper of the Lamb, Billy will be sitting on my left so that we don’t bump elbows while we’re eating! I am right handed and Billy was left handed on Earth and he is still left handed in Heaven. (Revelation 19:6-10)
May you receive God’s many blessings this day and everyday.
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