Published by cmadams
I am now a Mother that no one wants to be. I love my children more than life itself and my world got turned upside down when my 1st born son Billy, also known as Liam, was murdered by a stranger in a random act of violence. I have 3 remaining living, breathing, amazing children, 2 sons and 1 daughter, 3 living,breathing,amazing step-sons and each and every one is special,creative,and unique! I also have 3 beautiful grandchildren! 2 Grandsons ages 7and 8 and a precious 3 year old Granddaughter! My Grandson Logan, is Billy’s only child, he is now 8 years old. As my daughter says, he is the warm piece of Billy that we get to touch. I enjoy cherishing and taking care of my husband and my family, leading a healthy lifestyle in spirit, soul and body, clean eating, CrossFit, sunshine,rest, listening to music and singing along! I will never be who I was before this happened. I am dedicated to learn what I can, embrace the pain, and share my raw, wounded, healing heart that is daily changing due to this great tragedy. My hope is touch lives in many ways,no matter how big or small, in honor and in memory of my son, Billy.He will live on through my words, the words of his Mother and the hearts of his family💗
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I saw a sliver of a rainbow this morning.
It definitely made me think of Billy and the promise I have of seeing him again.
This time last year was the last time I saw my son alive.
We were celebrating Logan’s 5th birthday and I had just had surgery.
Billy was very attentive to me.
He helped me take my jacket off. He helped me stand up.
I showed him the scar from my surgery.
Billy was so concerned about me.
I sat with him while we ate Birthday cake.
As we were leaving the party, I looked deep in his eyes before I turned around and we went our separate ways.
It reminds me of the song “See you Again” by Carrie Underwood
That is exactly what happened.https://youtu.be/Esf9NVqAmMg
Said goodbye, turned around and you were gone, gone, gone, faded into the setting sun, slipped away…
I will never forget that moment. I would give anything to have more moments.
Until I see you again Billy, I love you.
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